The boys had been playing in the yard on this particular evening. They had so much fun playing and left a new book I got for them on the deck outside.
I found the book where they left it; all soggy the next morning while they were at school. Of course, you can imagine the emotion I felt next wasn’t calmness. It was more like furious.
Why do these boys do these? This is where I add the really angry emoji😡😡😡
They got back and by then I had forgotten about the story until the next day when we found another important item on the grass in the yard. Events had repeated itself. This is a moment of double jeopardy for them.
They were now in hot soup. I was ready to teach them an important lesson in life. Things are expensive and they need to learn to care for their things now. I am angry and my temper is mounting up…
All of a sudden I remember a similar event in my childhood.
It was inter-house sports season at SDA primary school and I was the one selected to lead the matching squad for the green house. I was the queen of the house. I needed to have nice outfits.
My mom had given me money to buy the new sports wares from school. But I still needed new white tennis shoes. I remember begging her for that and she wanted me to use an old one I had. I begged and begged until she eventually got them for me.
The day was fun, I can’t remember my house’s overall position but I had so much fun. I got back home and continued the fun till late. It rained that evening.
The next day my mom found my new tennis shoes in the mod in our compound. The color was now brown and it was wet from the rain.
Oh, she was furious.
She made me kneel down that day and was going to teach me a lesson. This is one time I remember my mom giving me a serious punishment. I will never forget.
After a few minutes of kneeling, I was already crying. I couldn’t really beg her to let me go but my tears were tears of regrets. She kept me there until God sent an angel to plead for me.
This angel was Daddy Olufayo (of blessed memories). A family friend and a gentleman to the core.
He was the one that convinced my mom that I have learned my lesson and would never do it again.
And I never did.
And now back to Bluffwood Avenue, the boys were still in front of me in distress, really begging me and wondering what their punishment was going to be; knowing they had done wrong.
Then I decided to tell them the story above and told them God reminded me so I can show them mercy. And I did.
They were both shocked and grateful at the same time. They always remind me of this incidence as a show of mercy. And I truly hope they learned their lesson.
We can choose to use the steering power of our tongues.
The problem is that many time we tend to leave our tongues in the auto pilot mode. And of course, like the car or ship left in autopilot mode for too long, a crash is ahead and mighty.
Many times we just let our mouths go, with the assumption that; “he knows, she knows, they know”.
I have left my mouth on autopilot mode many times and the result is not usually good. Then I need to repent and apologize and trust God to steer things back to the right course.
We must learn to trust God with our words. And trust Him to practice silence and not talking or reacting in haste.
“Consider ships: They are so large that strong winds are needed to drive them. But pilots direct their ships wherever they want with a little rudder. In the same way, even though the tongue is a small part of the body, it boasts wildly….”
We may feel like someone pushed us to react in a certain way and that may be true. However, we have the responsibility of choosing to behave the way we want to.
We have an idea where we want our lives to head, we must continue to choose our words to steer things in the right direction.
The main issue here though is to actually remember to use that steering power of our tongue.
So help us, God!
What about you? How easy is it to remember to use your tongue’s steering power?
Pls, leave your comments below.
The longer i have lived, the more I have learned.As a parent,friend or spouse,this is tempered by my own experiences.I can say im more self aware and self controlled than I ever was
Thanks for the message and example shared. I must admit so many times I’ve fallen for that “this is the nth time this is happening so don’t be quiet about it”. I tend to think that if a strong message is not passed across, then the other person (in some cases e.g. with kids) does not see the gravity of the wrong done. My challenge: strong message starts off well then ends up in autopilot mode.
Thanks, T. Base
You are right. As a parent, I can say I understand what you mean.
I trust God’s instruction for each moment, especially with my children. Sometimes the what-ifs come to mind, and then I remember the scripture that says “perfect love casts out all fears” Then I trust God to reveal His love to me and through me. Of course, love is sometimes expressed in tough ways. I continue to trust God for great parenting outcomes.
“We must learn to trust God with our words. And trust Him to practice silence and not talking or reacting in haste”….
That’s the right phrase, reacting in haste when angry most times don’t give a good outcome, it spoils the situation even more.
Have also come to learn that a few minutes of silence when am angry really calms me and helps to give a better reply to the situation. For me the period of silence it’s not just a few minutes of not talking (it even goes beyond not responding when necessary) but also of learning, thinking and cordinating myslef for a better response.
Amazing practice.
As we grow in our understanding of who is in charge of our lives (God), the urge to be in charge of situations will reduce.
Great stuff, if only we just realise that our words are full of power, i guess we’ll be more careful. Not only when angry, as the saying goes, you have two ears and one mouth, you should do more listening than speaking.
Thanks, Egbon mi atata!
Keep leading on.