A few months ago, if you had asked if I thought I talk a lot, I would have sincerely answered with a big-NO! Now, however, the more I think about it, the more I think the answer could be….well, may be (is that a sign of denial?).
Interestingly, I never saw myself as a person that talks a lot. Though I remember I used to love chatting with my big sister and catching her up on happenings at home while she was away at school. I didn’t think it was any big issue. I also knew I love details and not summaries and that’s what I give. And my past jobs, well, always had some form of talking involved. Don’t judge me, but still, I didn’t have a clue.
This notion only changed recently.
(By the way, each of my daily post title this month is influenced by the email I get from the power of word challenge)
In your own opinion…
Do you talk a lot? Do you tend to interrupt during a conversation
Do you get inspired to say everything about a subject matter?
Are you a person of many or few words? Ask someone who knows you to describe you. Especially the quiet people you know.
Do People Think You Talk a Lot?
You may also ask someone who knows you to help. Especially the quiet people you know. Ask them if they think you talk a lot.
Caution: depending on your level of growth, you may really become resentful hearing people’s opinions of you.
I was there… We had an ice breaker exercise once at church that got me really upset. It was about giving feedback on what each person should improve on. By the time we were done, I felt like I was the worst person in the church. I am sure there were positive comments but the negatives lingered for me. Until months later when I was able to let the pain go.
What does God think?
The truth though is that if you really want to grow, you need honest feedbacks from people that love you. And hopefully, you can calm down and bring these feedbacks back to God, which was what I did; eventually.
Again the aim is to go to God and present what His other children have said about you. He is your father and knows you a lot more than anyone else. Chances are that some, if not all, of the feedback you get, is true.
You can also start with doing a review of your day with Him. This is a practice I started with. And my God always has a way of lovingly helping me see where I am. Now I go to Him faster for such reviews.
Ok, like me may be you have been able to wrap your mind around the fact that…yeah, you talk a lot…at least in sometimes.
Reasons People Talk a lot
To better understand, let’s consider why we even talk a lot. The first reason I can think of is that if you are in the position of listening to others (may be even a mom of a preschooler) when you finally find listening ears you may tend to go on and on.
You may also use talking as a way to clarify your own thoughts. Other times it’s that you have taken on the responsibility of entertaining others. “If I don’t talk no one would and I won’t want it to be boring”. Or may be you are trying to impress others unconsciously.
The bad thing though is that, when we talk a lot, we may begin to say things that we don’t mean and before you know it, sin creeps in. You may begin to use your words to prove a point or as a weapon of war to attack others.
As I have thought deeper about this, I also noticed that talkers feel the urgency to talk, they believe they have this fantastic thing to talk about and now. You can actually keep talking without allowing others to say a word. You ask a question and then they answer it because the silence felt awkward.
You can get so carried away talking and not realize that your listener is already disconnected, restless and is now disinterested.
Anyway, I think I should keep quiet now, enough of talking 😉
Let’s look at God’s words
Proverbs 10:19 Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut. NLT
Proverbs 17: 27&28 A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered. Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent; with their mouths shut, they seem intelligent. NLT
Ecclesiastes 6:11 The more words you speak, the less they mean. So what good are they? NLT
Proverbs 29:20 Do you see a man who speaks too soon? There is more hope for a fool than for him. HCSB
James 1:19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. NLT
Jame 1:26 If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless. NLT
Thankfully we have a helper! He lives in you.
Helpful Tips: T-H-I-N-K!
I found this helpful tips (acronym) to help you before you speak. I am not sure who made it up, let me know if you find the author.
T-True- What you are about to say, is it true?
H-Helpful- What you are about to say, is it Helpful for anyone?
I-Inspirational- What you are about to say, is it inspirational?
N-Necessary- What you are about to say, is it necessary?
K-Kind- What you are about to say, is it kind?
Colossians 4:6 Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.
Have you ever tried reserving some of your words in a conversation? This is something I recently began to do consciously. Now I wait for Gods prompting before I talk. I still get it wrong at times but I am not giving up.
The most important thing is that I am now consciously aware that God must be a part of everything I say. He wants to be a part of every aspect of our lives.
We must trust him to mold your words.
Lord help me to relax when I feel I need to say something urgently. That I will first confirm with you first before gushing in out.
I need thee every hour.